/ Sookie threw up on Alcide's shoes. (Instead of his crotch, which would have been way funnier.)
/ It seems like Corbett and Michelle were both part-fairy, even though the math on that doesn't work.
/ The Authority and the Queen hated each other, but they apparently used the same architects.
/ Terry's unit is being stalked by a Middle Eastern fire monster.
/ Jesus's disembodied head is trying to talk to people.
/ Sam and Luna got shot, and I'm 97% sure Luna is dead.
/ Bill and Sookie were holding hands for a minute there, and I liked it.
/ Tara fed on Hoyt, and Jessica's mad, and now there's a catfight on.
/ AND ROMAN IS WEARING A POLO SHIRT IN THE PREVIEW. I GIVE UP.
This is not a list of complaints. Some of these things I did enjoy. Plus, there were some other things I loved. (Sookie being awesome again. Pam's look, oh my Godddddd. Tara and Jessica being girlfriends. "Jumbo coffee and box of Nutter Butters.") But this episode felt a lot like somebody trying to cure me of my sanity using immersion therapy.
I get it now! Russell is Voldemort! This show isn't a political allegory at all! IT'S HARRY POTTER FOR PERVS.